Oh no.

21km this saturday but i'm nowhere near race ready. I'm still recovering from a bout of flu, fever cough. I barely did 4km today when my body decided to shut down.

It's bad. But at least i know i've got the drama out of my system - I can't handle all the girl drama so i'm doing what i do best, walking away. Sad thing is alot of friendships at stake is going out of the window. I guess i can handle that.

Got too much to handle at work and time to prepare for Dec's 42km.

Goodbye drama, hello focus.

Choices

My time is running out and i have to make a decision hard and fast. Usually a good run would help clear my mind and set my heart at peace.

This time, i don't even have the mood to run. I changed into my kit and just sat there - i couldnt even lift myself off the chair to lace up.

I'm not depressed, i'm not sad. It's a happy problem you could say - but i'm just afraid of making promises i cannot keep. Saying things that i have to take back.

Maybe not so bad la. But my focus has clearly been off. 21km less than 2 weeks' away, i need to get my focus back where it should - juggling between gym and distance running.

Always.

OSIM 2011

Time for my race update! In short, I not only failed to improve my timing, I clocked slower and dropped in rankings. Depressed? Nope.

Firstly, there are legit reasons I could use as an excuses to explain the drop in timing. This year’s waves were tough. I found my strokes and rhythm all over the place, bobbing up and down and tossed off course. I found my swim leg down by a whopping 3 minutes.

The bike leg was surprisingly painless. Although I did clock a time 2 minutes slower, compared to last year’s race, my legs still felt fresh after the 40km. Oh did I mention that I only found out it was a 4 lap bike leg at the very last minute before the horn went off? A friend I met (Thanks KK!) at the start line casually wished me all the best for the 4 laps on the bike – say what? 4?!

Then on the bike leg, I actually asked fellow cyclists if it was 4 or 6 laps. Some said 4, others said 6. In the end, based on plausible timing, I settled for 4. Pity those fellas who said 6 and actually did it. That’s extra 20km on the bike. Wa. Might as well go do Ironman. Suayamakalaosai.

Anyway, back to the race. By the time I racked my bike, my legs were surprisingly fresh. I glanced at my watch and I knew I needed to do a hell of a run to make back the time. At about the 2km point, I figured I couldn’t beat the clock at the risk of burning out of air too soon. So I decided to just screw it, take my time and enjoy the race. Since I can’t beat the clock, let’s make this a race to remember.

And remember I did.

Race lesson #356 – Never try a power gel for the first time at the race itself. Sublime Lime flavor my arse! Rar!

That lime-flavored gel gave me the runs. I getting the runs while I was running. I was seriously fighting the urge to go take a poop. I was farting uncontrollably midway during the race. But heck I was too tired to care about people giving me stares or pinching their nose at me in disgust.

I clearly remember trying to psycho myself saying, “you can’t sh*t…you can’t sh*t…cos got no toilet paper..cos got no toilet paper”.

Don’t laugh. It worked.

And other than the minor breaks in running rhythm to break wind, overall I’m glad I kept pace throughout the run and viola! I managed to cut my run time.

So all in all, I clocked 3 minutes slower than last year. As I said, I could blame it on the choppy waves and tummyache, but that should be acceptable in every race and I’m not kicking myself about it. I’m glad I kept a good pace throughout and that, more than anything else, has motivated me (not out of anger and disappointment) to race better, train harder.

Next up in 3 weeks… 21km!